Rocking Relations?

whichever way it works!

Is your marriage on d rocks? Does living with your in laws seem like a nerve racking shack? Do not run into hasty decisions especially if there is a kiddo involved. This might sound a little cinematic but please know that there are no two people ever made for each other. It’s what we mend ourselves for each other that makes us truly the perfect pair. 

Ever wondered if may be everyone in the world is happy with relationships but for you? Well, for starters those who you know are not the ‘world’ and what you know about them could be wrong(Exceptions excepted). Every couple in this world would go through a frictional phase before understanding each other completely. Do not be deceived by fb posts or public displays of affection and get yourself carried away. I personally know of a lady who publicly screams foul language on her hubby and everyone around her, but her fb posts would be oozing out love for one another every single day(she sure as hell is not on my friends list now). I mean granted those kind of pyschos are a rare find but the point is many are not as it seems. Those who truly are, would have gone through the same.

A recent and unfortunate incident about my dear friend’s divorce from her hubby is precisely the motivation behind this post. Of may be the 10 divorces that I personally know of, only one was because one of them was a pyscho, rest nine were due to misunderstandings. 

Any kind of marriage (love or arranged) will and for sure pass through at least these 4 stages. Attraction, Friction, Understanding & Adjustment and Maturity & Trust. All relationships of course starts with some kind of attraction (I mean why else would you marry them right?). Sadly this is the most short lived phase. It lasts only for a couple of months and for some only weeks. Everything about each other would be so likeable. But should I say this is also the phase where you start hating your in laws (and they, you) the most. 

Then comes the war,  the friction phase.You start quarrelling on the worlds most silliest things. Ego takes control and not to mention some of in law’s insecurity playing its devilish roles ;-). Fight, Fight, every time, everywhere.
Suddenly the once so dreamt about life would seem like a hell. The face that once evoked eternal love would now invoke Irritation. Many would feel like going back to phase 0 (did i mention? - before marriage). 

After that for some it takes longer, for some its a quick realisation and sadly for a few the next phase never comes, which is adjusting for and understanding each other. Set aside your differences and sit and talk. Most of the times one would end up fighting again with the other but keep trying. 90 % of the issues will get resolved when you talk free and your mind out. Please refrain from having such conversations during a fight. You know how when you are angry all those bad words just slip out like word vomit? I would say it is better to shut our mouth up and sit in silence for sometime and concentrate on allowing our defences to calm down a bit. Put yourself in each others shoes. For e.g.. It might be just cricket for you, but for him its the god's own Play!! likewise she might be your sweet lovely mom but for her she would be an insecure Hitler with extra powers. Today it might be easy to break the relationship and move on, but what next? you start from the beginning with the next person and so on and so forth. Those who think of living alone, please remember old-age sucks even with someone to lean on to!! Sit down and arrive at a fair middle point and work towards it, for when you touch the line, you would actually be holding hands. 

Once that phase sets and both begin to bend themselves for the other, maturity dawns. Love after this phase is like wine, the more the years the better it becomes.From the time a couple is in this phase there is no turning back. Very less expectations but lots of satisfactions, one is not needed to spill the beans because it is already understood, speaking silence more than words, defending each other, tackling problems together, appreciating more, nagging less, laughing together upon silly fights, and of course showering loads and loads of affectionate love-These are all a possibility one day in every relationship and when that stage comes you will truly be the most wonderful “made for each other” in the whole damn world. And when kids come either in the third or fourth stage into your lives then your family would indeed be ‘Rocking’ but in a whole other sense!!! 

~ Family is life's greatest blessing and god's earlier heaven!!

My First Blog - Healthy weight loss

Ok, So I have decided to blog. :-D Why not start with something that’s down right healthy? Many of us (excluding those with a mix of awesome DNA and some kinda pre-birth boon) are a little plump and we think it is soooo difficult to actually shape up. It really isn’t. Here I am after reducing close to 20 kgs and still getting in shape giving you some much needed tips. Frankly, the hardest part was to get that inertia started… For me to shed all that loads it took close to 2 years. Although it is a slow process, even as early as a month you would start feeling the difference to get high on life. ;-P

Tip no 1.

First and foremost, cut your intake of sugar (in all forms). If you are one of those who drink a glass of fruit juice in the morning to do themselves a big time favor, then stop that glass right there. All that fructose, even those coming from natural fruits aren’t going to do any favor in terms of weight loss. Sugar accumulates fat in your body esp. near your waist. So cut it.. from your tea, from your juice, and morning cereal. Yummy mouth watering pastries, cakes, ice-creams are all a big NO. An easy way to master your control would be to have yourself an indulgence day. Yeah you heard me right. If you are going to really cut down on your daily sugar intake, it wouldn’t hurt your body if you indulge yourself once in fifteen days. You could choose one day, have loads of your choice of sweet and move ahead. Remember when you do, make sure to follow it up immediately with a cup of green tea. Green tea really helps cut down those sugars adultering the blood in your body. Having fruits (not juicy) once a week is fine. So yeah that sums up, NO sugar.

Tip no 2.

Second, if you haven’t started already rush to the nearest grocery store and get yourself a big box of green tea bags. Green tea is not only rich in anti-oxidants but also helps your body maintain proper metabolism and hence no extra fat deposit, which means yayy!!! And mind you - there is no workaround to drinking that horribly tasting boiling water. Just get used to it.          I have seen people adding sugar (mounts of them) to drink it. If you are going to add sugar, you might as well pour it down the drain. So it’s just plain old boiling green tea probably flavored with lemon or ginger or mint of your choice.

Tip no 3.

Diet – a word you always hear if you need to reduce. There are all kinds of diet in the world starting from GM diet to those fancy charts tailored for you by your gym master or personal dietician. Well, nothing ever worked for me. In the end one might end up feeling tired and overwhelmed. So unless you are hogging all day on chips and McDs and French fries, you need not diet as such but just reduce your meals by 1/3^rd. The Thumb rule is to eat only till you are slightly full. For eg, if you generally eat 4 rotis then limit it to 3. Likewise for rice too, stop it when you can still have some more. It doesn’t matter whether you eat rice or wheat, eat the right quantity. Compliment your plate with lots of vegetables. Ppl eating non-veg could limit their intake of fatty meats too. Make sure you don’t eat junk. Junks are righteously named so and are far more ornamental to a trash bin than to your plate.

Tip no 4.

Last but not the least - EXERCISE. It is a must if one wants to cut down on weight, cholesterol and so many diseases that I can’t even summarize. Exercising not only burns calories but also increases stamina. All that muscle pain, pulls and catches here and there are all long gone even before you start reducing. Even if a person is pencil line thin, they might still wanna exercise for all the benefits it has. Of course the amount of time and the level of exercise depend upon how far along you are on the weighing scale. Well as for what to do in gym, I strongly recommend running on the treadmill, little of cross trainer and some floor exercise. Running on even ground is a great cardio that increases your stamina sooo much that you start feeling it in your day to day activities. Just 2 months into constant running on the treadmill - team building activities and treks will become your piece of cake. Best part is that even after doing all that work, you won’t feel tired. :-D If you are not a runner already, start slowly by running for at least 5 mins straight. Set a simple goal and try to finish it. It doesn’t matter how long you run as long as you run. For those who can’t run, a strict 30 min routine on the treadmill is a must. They can walk fast. While shedding those calories on the treadmill if you want to concentrate specifically on belly fat, increase the inclination without decreasing the speed. Increasing the inclination works on your entire body and target belly as well.

Yoga is also a great way to rejuvenate you every day. Once early in the morning or evening on a mat and you will realize how simple set of exercises can make not only your body feel healthy but your mind too. For a faster way to reduce always combine your gym routine with yoga. If you don’t have time to do both, make a routine with 4 days gym and 3 days yoga. If you know how to swim, make that 3 days gym + 3 days yoga + 1 day swimming. That one day swimming can always be replaced with your favorite outdoor sports as well. Tennis or badminton players can always sweat out on their fav game. It makes you feel gr8 too.

Don’t forget to do Floor exercises to tame your tummy or thighs or butt. These are a must. No matter how much you run or do yoga or play badminton if you are not gonna target your tummy that stubborn S**OB is not gonna go down easily ;-P. Tummy fat is not only the one that gets deposited fast but is also very difficult to go. So lie down after a gym routine and do at least 2 stomach/thigh/butt crunches of two 50 sets each.

So that was that.. I have mentioned everything that I did, even the ones I did not do (only stomach crunches for me) to reduce. Well I’m no certified instructor but these really helped me a lot. I did not have a professional coach or a certified dietician. All that knowledge is pure google search. You could always learn yoga, gyming and stuff online in youtube and figure out the ones that suits you best. I for one learned how to swim online. Hope this helps.. I am including a before and after pic of mine for your reference and motivation.. :-))

Before but after pregnancy:                               After: